The Seed by Elisa Gray

I sucked my thumb.
And now I am not what I seem to be.
I am Gwion yet I am a seed, I am here to germinate and yet my journey’s end will not be the same as the seeds that I fell upon.
Am I Gwion?
Do I even exist anymore?
Or has the powerful brew I drank reduced me down to a speck, a spark
Life itself?
I dropped from the sky where I had flown.
O yes, I flew!
Can you imagine it?
I soared through the sky on feathered wings, my clawed feet grabbing at the currents of air beneath me.
I swam and ran and that’s where it had started,
The spots of the Awen burned me and I sucked my thumb
And she,
The woman who made the brew.
She chased me in many forms.
And now I think I’m outside of myself, but inside of myself;
inside her.
It’s warm and dark and I feel another shift,
I’m melting, turning into the soup of creation.
My atoms swirl and dance in this soft tomb,
It’s full of stars!
I am dead
Yet I am alive.
I feel new organs forming within the pulp of my flesh.
A new brain, one that thinks and knows more than it did before,
I have arms, legs, I can stretch out my tiny fingers and touch the cord that binds me
To her.
My mother, my murderess, my magical queen.
I slumber in the cauldron, I am what she created.
I am safe inside.
But when I am born……..
Thrust forth from her cauldron, born of the Awen twice.
My creator looks down at me, a dagger in her hand.
But she cannot finish what she has started for I am her and she is me.
I gurgle and coo and she melts, as I melted, she shifts, as I shifted.
She softens and smiles and transforms from my murderess to my mother.
And I, as I had when all this began, stared up at her and sucked my thumb.
Elisa Gray
Elisa M Gray, Sister of Cerridwen
Glastonbury, UK
Facebook Page: The Way of the Shamanic Witch
Elisa is author of the book “What Maketh the Witch’ and is a traditional eclectic witch and advanced shamanic practitioner. As a published writer and artist, she is a strong advocate of the old ways of witchcraft as well as one of the cunning folk. Elisa holds witchcraft courses online for both basic and advanced witchcraft.